This 'Ish is Personal - 2018: The Year of Building Muscle

On December 4, 2017, I sat at my desk in my home office-space and stared at a white-board full of goals I’d created at the beginning of the year. After the white-board, I glanced at 7 green pages full of blueprints breaking down each goal I’d scribbled on the white-board. Thinking there was no way I accomplished anything I originally set out to, I unpinned the green papers from the wall and began reading through those blueprints. Each page contained a goal in a different category of life (Spiritual, Personal, Family, Financial, Physical Fitness, Career [Long-Term], and Job [Short-Term]). Below each goal, written in a section designated by a drawn line, was my ‘why’ – the reason I had hoped to accomplish said goal. Finally, in the bottom section, written in almost illegible cursive, were 10 practical ways for accomplishing the goal outlined at the top of the page. While reading through them, my spirit turned from cold and disappointed to warm and excited. I realized I had accomplished more than I initially thought. Yet, I had still missed out on some exciting and pivotal opportunities. Because I wasn’t ready.

On December 14, 2017, I erased what was on the white-board, threw away the green sheets, and started over. Seven new goals and an entire year to live with no fear and seize every opportunity, no matter how scary. I hung the white-board on the wall and stared at it. Something was missing. I reviewed each goal and still felt ill prepared. What if another opportunity arose like that one that I missed in that one email? Or another like that one that I shied away from at that one networking event? Or the other that I didn’t even submit an entry for? And why wasn’t I prepared for the opportunities that presented themselves? Because I hadn’t done the work.

I hadn’t done the spiritual work necessary to live without fear, all year long, 365 days. It’s true what they say, the Bible states some derivation of “Fear not” 365 times. That’s an easy daily reminder to just do it, yet I allowed fear to control much of my actions in 2017. I hadn’t done the physical work necessary to have the stamina my body needed to withstand the grind. Now, don’t get me wrong, I still subscribed to the grind all of 2017. But I was sick, tired, confused, and cloudy too. I began the year with a strong physical fitness ethic but quickly allowed the stresses of my day job to interfere with being proactive about my health. I also hadn’t done the mental and emotional work necessary to go at the grind alone. Mind you, I have a strong support system in my family, my man (&prayer partner), and friends surrounding me who feed me. But there are times (most of the time) when I am alone and must motivate myself. And, in 2017, I often found myself unmotivated, mentally blocked, and just plain too sad from being lonely to be creative. Lastly, I hadn’t done the professional work necessary to move both KROUN and my career as an epidemiologist forward. To the untrained eye, my professional life seems pretty exciting - it's all-the-rage. The long and short of it is that it is not. And I know there are certain steps I must take to improve this area of my life.

So, in 2018, ALL 2018, I’ll be doing the necessary work to build the muscle I need spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and professionally to be READY to win. It’s true. Stay ready so you don’t have to get ready. As of today, January 4, 2018, I’m not totally certain of what the ‘work’ looks like. However, I’m ready. I’m ready to do the work. God first - I am ready.